33. Stuck In The Self-Help Maze

33. Stuck In The Self-Help Maze

Is there one best way to navigate life? How can we handle the deep lows and also soar to new heights? How can we make our lives more fulfilling, authentic and meaningful? Why on earth are we even here?!

If you seek answers to these sorts of questions, chances are you are familiar with the self-help industry where so much wisdom and knowledge is at our fingertips to help us, help ourselves.

You’ll also realise that as there is so much wisdom and knowledge, once you’re in it, it can feel like you are stuck in a maze. Which way should we turn? Which path should we take?

Spaghetti junction

‘Spaghetti Junction’ is a nickname sometimes given to a complicated or massively intertwined road traffic interchange that resembles a plate of spaghetti (Wikipedia). The self-help world can seem like a spaghetti junction! In this complex maze of roads, we might feel lost, we might feel stuck, or we might think we’ve taken a wrong turn.

If we took a left, we were taught to control our thoughts; eliminate the negative, increase the positive and use the Law of Attraction to create the life we want. But in the other direction we were taught to forget all that; instead, detach from any thoughts and live life from the seat of your untainted soul.

Are these opposite teachings? Which is right?

Around the corner in the self-help maze you can delve into your past traumas and experience emotional healing. At the next turn is a route to seeing such traumas as nothing more than a ‘story’ in your mind which you can choose to stop reinforcing.

Which of these should we pursue?

Up another road is meditation, being in nature and praying. Around the corner is a world where we simply dive head first into anything we enjoy in life. Up ahead you’ll see a life of yoga and only eating a plant based diet and later you reach a fork in the road offering many life coaches and spiritual retreats.

Which of these will get us out of the maze and into lasting peace and happiness?!

None of them and all of them.

Self-help is not about an end goal. Personal growth is not about right and wrong. There’s no single answer to ‘get there’ and there is no exit to this maze that will bring you lasting peace and whatever else you seek. Yet, everything you seek is totally attainable.

The power of self-help and personal development lies in each step you take within the maze. Within each new realisation about what’s going on inside you and within each new spark of self-awareness, your inner light shines a little brighter.

Every one of the approaches above – and the many more that exist – help you to strengthen your inner world and your self awareness.

When you realise this, you’ll never be ‘stuck’ or ‘unsure’. Because there’s no right or wrong, there’s is only continued growth and experiencing.

Enjoy wandering through the maze

The only thing you need to be concerned with is what resonates with you at any given time. And know that what resonates now, may not be what resonates in six months or a years time. So remain open to everything!

I’ve taken and continue to take all the paths above, and more. There’s not a single one that hasn’t helped me in some way. Even the ones that look like total opposites have their place.

Take a wander on your unique path.

Forget what anyone else is doing.


Try stuff.

Learn stuff.

Bit by bit, you are growing and expanding your inner wellbeing and that will reflect in your outer world.

The joy you seek, is in the maze. The love you seek, is in the maze. Everything you seek, is in the maze. Not at the exit.

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