I was born in the UK and then lived in India for the first few years of my life. This required me to be separated from my parents and if you know anything about child development, you’ll know that this created an abandonment wound in my psyche which would stay with me for many years to come (aka forever).
I hate to say but my childhood wasn’t great – I also don’t want to make a sob story about it or act like I had it the worst – after all, there’s almost always someone worse off than you, right?
But I also won’t minimise my own struggles and will acknowledge the role they play in my life because it’s huge – our childhood dictates our adulthood.
To keep it simple, what I went through was abusive, controlling and really difficult. ‘Dysfunctional’ is an understatement. On top of challenging family dynamics, no doubt caused by generations of trauma passed down to me, I had the immense challenge of being torn between two cultures.
I was growing up as a British Indian, wanting to enjoy the freedoms of the UK but, being dragged back to the oppression of 1940’s India by my parents and relatives at every turn. That was and still is, a never ending challenge. From the pressures of arranged marriage to the deep and often unspoken shame about being a woman, sexuality, relationships and femininity. From being shouted down and punished when I dared to express my own opinion to the incessant drive to make me behave like a quiet, subservient little Indian girl – I was in a constant battle for my own life. A battle between who I was and who everyone else wanted me to be. It’s no wonder that I now teach resilience because boy, I had to have bucket loads of it just to stay alive.
Ok, now let’s talk about some fun stuff!!
In amongst all that pain, I had a wonderfully magical fascination with life! I would look up at the stars in awe (still do). I would get goosebumps when I pondered “who am I?”. I got so excited when we learned about the Egyptians at school, I found it so mystical and dreamt of going to the pyramids one day (still on the ‘to-do’ list!). I also found great solace in creativity and play, I loved learning and getting lost in my own vivid imagination.
I graduated with a BSc in Biochemistry and Neurobiology and a MSc in Technology and Innovation Management. I then had a great 10+ year career in professional services, project and programme management, and management consulting for government and public sector organisations.
Alongside all of that, I was feeding my need to know more about the meaning of life. I was learning about quantum physics, the law of attraction, meditation and spirituality, positive and classic psychology, child development, trauma, abuse and many other topics.
I trained with world experts including Dr Gabor Maté and more recently came across the discipline of creative development and alchemy, taught by William Whitecloud. This work in particular has changed my life. In three years I have broken through 40 years of shame filled, dysfunctional family dynamics, I have created the relationship of my dreams, created a new home and a business that continues to develop and grow. This is through deep mastery of my own consciousness and living a life guided by my soul and intuition, not driven by the wounds of my past.
Sharing it all with others
In a nutshell, that’s what I now do – share it. I teach what I’ve learned and what I apply – I don’t just teach from a text book, I teach from real life experience.
So, if you come across my work – whether it’s the freebies on social media, or my paid courses, talks and coaching, I hope that it gives you something to implement, some new level of awareness, some cool tools to use.
I hope it gives you hope and inspiration, especially if you’re having a rough time.
I hope it shows you that you are an incredibly powerful force, an innately resilient being who can handle more than you know.
You’re a supernatural star, a conscious creator of reality, an eternal spirit in a transient human form.
So, as I mentioned on the front page… and just as I did when I was young… I encourage you to: “Look up at the stars, not down at your feet” (Stephen Hawking).
With love,
Pinky
